Recently, my father and my three-year-old nephew uncovered a video tape of one of my dance rehearsals from when I was five. After attentively watching 30 small children going “shuffle-ball-change” for 10 minutes or so, my sister popped her head in and asked my nephew if he wanted to take singing and dancing lessons. Without missing a beat, he replied, “Nope.”
Like my nephew, my sister is not a performer, but of the two of us, she’s the true comedienne. So I’ve decided to dedicate a portion of my blog to the random musings she sends me throughout the day. I’d like to start first with some classics from our childhood:
“I love using the microwave because every time I get my food, an angel gets its wings.”
Sister: “Hey, Jesus.”
Me: “You mean me?”
Sister: “Yeah, you. Jesus.”
Me: “Why are you calling me that?”
Sister: “It’s quicker than saying, ‘Jesus, Gia.'”
One time, I was doing tour jetes (this girl does them beautifully!) in our living room when I landed wrong and broke my ankle. As I lay on the floor crying, my sister laughed so hard, she peed her pants.
It’s like living with Chelsea Handler. Without the alcoholism.