It’s a proud day in any woman’s life when the closest thing she’ll have to offspring evolves from a tiny, needy infant into a walking, talking person. My oldest nephew, now aged four, is an undisputed genius. He, of course, shares roughly 25% of my genetic material, so how could he not be?
Here are some gems of his brilliance as captured by my sister (on her oversized Samsung Galaxy III enclosed in an OtterBox. Seriously. That’s not a phone–it’s a weapon. Except in Florida where it’s a method of self-defense.) I’ve commented on each text and rated it on a Genius Scale of 1-10.
Evan is rocking out to a lullaby version of Poison. Made. My. Day!
Clearly, my nephew already loves his early ’90s hip hop. Or at least what passed for it when you grew up in foothills of Colorado.
Genius Score: 3
Evan painted a praying mantis.
He is named after an entomologist, so the subject is a bit on the nose, but I think even Franz Klein is a little jealous of this masterpiece.
Genius Score: 8
This morning I said, “Jesus,” and Evan finished by saying, “Mary and Joseph.”
Comedy is one of the top 10 traits people look for in a mate. This fella will be killin’ with the ladies (or gentlemen–whichever he prefers!).
Genius Score: 6
Math question of the morning from Evan: What is zero times bush?
Answer: Trick question–Bush times anything is 0. (Rim shot, please!) Not only is Evan curious, but he’s already turning into a good progressive. Here’s to one more voter in support of equal rights and environmental advocacy. We have a winner!
Genius score: 10
Why is every Los Angeles comedy and “science commentator” I find childless? Is that the new fashionable, self indulgent, hip thing to do and just have pets as low maintenance children. Especially when espousing the merits of science to children. seems kind of ironic and counter productive in the long term when at the current there won’t be any children to teach the wonderful wonders of science to. But, you’ll still have your rescue animals.
Hi, guy–
Hate to break it to you–not all of us are childless. One of the Scirens, Tamara, has a little girl, and she loves teaching science to her daughter. The birth rate in the States doesn’t seem to be alarming demographers because those numbers don’t come too close to the lowered birthrates in Europe. Perhaps there are more of us LA comedy/science people who are childless because we’re generally young, and I think we are all working hard to take care of ourselves in a world where wages have essentially been stagnant since 1970 while the cost of living continues to increase. Most importantly, I don’t think anyone should become a parent unless s/he wants to be. The most self-indulgent behavior, in my view, is to have a child simply because you think you’re “supposed to.” Good parenting takes a lot more than simply giving birth. What would be ironic is if I did have kids while promoting climate disruption awareness. The numbers there don’t lie–want a smaller carbon footprint? Have fewer kids. I think the Duggar Family makes up for my lack of children in spades.
Well said Gia. As a parent myself I made the choice to have a child. 1 and that’s it. I wasn’t aware it was my duty to over populate the earth with my off spring.
Now my ex-wife, that’s a different story.. Since we’ve been divorced and she remarried she’s had two children and a third on the way.. But that was her choice.
I have friends that have been together for years (I mentioned this on your Facebook page) that have chosen not to have children. They hear over and over and over and over (yes that many times) Oh, you’ll change your minds! No, they won’t. Not now not ever.. And that’s their choice.. It’s hardly selfish at all. And I find it ironic that of all the people I know in my life they, the ones without children are the ones I trust the most with my son.
Having said all that… I’m starting to suspect my son is a genius. He’s reading a book by Michio Kaku regarding string theory. He’s coming to me with ideas I have no clue about. And by the way.. He’ll be 10 in a month.
Your son sounds AMAZING. I can’t wait to see who he grows up to be! And I’m grateful he has a nurturing parent who sees this greatness in him. Alas, not every child is a genius. I hear the argument that, if I had children, surely my kids would grow up to “be as great as you are.” Maybe so, but there’s also the possibility that I might have a child with learning or emotional or physical disabilities. Would I, as a potential parent, be ready to take on that responsibility? Would I be willing to roll the dice with the life of another human being? I feel that if I can’t, without hesitation, say yes, then my decision to remain childfree is the best choice I could make for everyone.